As an HSP, massage happens to be one of my favorite things in the world. So if time and finances permit, I try to receive at least one per month and two if I am so fortunate. Once in a while if my regular massage therapist is away, I might get adventurous. This past month, my gifted Lomi-Lomi therapist here in Kona was away for 3 weeks. It just so happened that a new gal moved in next door who was a licensed therapist and looking for work. Perfect! I thought. She was also a Kinesiologist and her vocabulary and anatomy knowledge seemed to indicate much wisdom and experience. So in my excited, over-stimulated HSP way, I let her do her thing. This involved much more rigorous activity on the table than I was used to. Muscle testing and resistance holds and full bent leg stretches while on my stomach, intense stimulation of pressure points, etc. I knew I was in trouble. I knew as an HSP I should say “whoa, Nellie.” But I didn’t. My old polite, people-pleasing ways in such a new situation and with a brand new person resurfaced, I remained quiet and followed every command. She advised me afterwards to take some Advil. Oh my … I’m in more trouble than I even thought. The next day I was mildly sore but okay. On the 2nd day, the pain began and it was intense. By the 3rd day, my body and brain responded as though it had been through a real trauma, like a mild car accident. I was in more than moderate pain and experienced a myalgic-like brain fog and other uninvited symptoms for nearly a week. Meanwhile, my fully non-HSP neighbor had received the same treatment from her the day before. She was fine; “Just a little sore, but so much better,” she said. And 2-3 days later, she felt “great.” This incident was totally my fault for remaining silent. This is not the first time I have allowed this to happen. However, one does tend to forget negative experiences and it had been years since I found myself in a setting with a new therapist when I was looking forward to some bodywork and all the benefits a good massage can offer at the end of a hard work week.The therapist was a genuinely wonderful person who wanted to give her very best gifts of healing (which were well received and successful for my non-HSP neighbor). Take home message for HSPs … yes be adventurous, but when it comes to engaging in bodywork with a new person, always err on the side of caution and SPEAK UP. I believe this was my final life lesson in this area!
First heal from a relationship before ever considering forgiving a narcissistic partner. It’s hard when they’ve been “too good to be true.”